FreshHalibut

Super Mario Bros. The Movie The Donkey Kong Country movie.

I consider myself terrible at this game. Somehow I was in the top 5 on Spufserver Classic.

-Deus Ex 1 -Garry's Mod -DAO:UE -Ski Free -TF2 -Torchlight 2 -Dawn of War: Soulstorm Dark Crusade -Fallout New Vegas -Dungeons of Dredmor -GTA4 Complete Edition

>Investigate the Wreckage to Determine Cause of Nap

The Stove Pipe looks pretty good with it. Also, Running out of Backpack space (again), wat do.

Seeing as how there's no way things can get worse, you decide to throw the last of the Orange Juice into the pit. It lands with a satisfying shatter on the remains of the Cannibals, and then explodes for some reason... OI, That wasn't suppose' ta happen. Oh good Gaben, what have you unleashed... Jenkins! This is all your fault! That Soldier might be a bit of a nuisance, but he did lead you right to the Engineer's Evil Volcano lair. Besides, he's not all bad, he blew up that sniper that's been dogging you for months and even gave you his necklace as a trophy. Suddenly you hear screaming. Your first thought is that it must be Jenkins, but the sight of that Spy from earlier falling to his doom crushes that theory. Looks like he managed to grab hold of something before hitting the Lava though... Looks like that Spy is getting what he deserves. Knowing all about pumpkin monsters you know all too well how this is going to end. Things aren't looking so great for the Engineer, but somehow he maintains his composure. Perhaps he knows things we don't? Or perhaps the future hasn't yet been written?

Install the Skyrim Crimes against Nature mod. You know you want to.

You Enter the Code: 537061776e20537079204469736775697365642061732047616265204e6577656c6c into your Omni-PDA and allow yourself to laugh Maniacally for a moment before coming to your senses, after all you have Guests coming. Before you can warm up another Pelvic Thrust the door opens of its own accord. You kind of figured the Engineer would secure his base a little better than that. Well, they Finally made it! After waiting intently for so long you definitely feel it was worth the wait. You greet them over and extend a hearty Handshake to Admiral Doe complimenting him on a Job well done. You can't believe it! All this time, it was just a test from Mr. Newell! You meet his handshake with one of your own and wonder what kind of fabulous prizes he's going to award you. After having done such a spectacular job recruiting the locals and blowing stuff up you can only imagine it as a brand new boat packed with Unusuals and soup. The rest of your group seems less enthusiastic, but what do they know? They're just a bunch of Cannibals and Jenkins. Everything's going just as you had hoped. Admiral Doe was far too starstruck by your clever ruse to notice the giant lava pool underneath him. That Jenkins Fellow seems a tad distracted, but no matter, nothing can save them now. As a Spy undisguises right in front of you you feel something is amiss... Wasn't Mr. Newell just here? Wait a minute... HE WAS A SPY ALL ALONG! AND WHERE DID THE FLOOR JUST GO!? GOOD GABEN THIS WAS ALL JUST A SET UP! Jenkins, by some miracle, manages to grab hold of a ledge instead of falling into the pit. Following suit, you grab onto Jenkins. There's no way he can pull you both up onto that ledge, not with all your rippling muscles and improbably large inventory hanging off of him. You can only hope the Pirate Captain gets here soon and isn't too mad at you. Looks like they weren't as lucky... If that fall didn't kill them, the lava certainly did. Not to mention getting clubbed in the head with that spiked shield that just fell off your belt. You'll have to remember to ask the Pirate Captain if he has any extras... if he ever gets here that is.

After this stunning revelation, you take a moment to better prepare yourself for the inevitable battles to come. So you take the metal bits from both the Shields and merge them into one even-better-than-wood Metal shield. This one has an even pointier Pelvic Spike and comes pre-covered in blood. You're sure it will come in handy when you finally get a chance to practice that new Atomic Pelvic Thrust technique you picked up a while ago. Having properly prepared yourself for the journey ahead the party advances into the cave for what will surely be an easy victory... or not. The Cannibal chief has returned, even angrier than before, and this time he's riding some kind of prehistoric monstrosity. Obviously there is only one course of action in this situation. That Atomic thrust was more powerful than you could have ever imagined! The only thing left from that blast is giblet rain. All in due time, no sense running headlong into the unknown. You and the rest of the Party take a break after that confrontation, there's no telling what the Engineer might have cooked up behind those blast doors. Upon being stirred by a large explosion, the Pirate Captain finally wakes up from his obviously-not-Orange-Juice-at-all related hangover. Upon further inspection of the offending liquid, this is actually a flask of "Science Juice," a substance that the Engineer has been producing to power all his improbable machines. There's no harm in saving it for later, might come in handy if that soldier finds a way off this blasted island. Noting the explosion that shoot you awake, you take that as a sign of positive progress and decide to have a celebratory drink from your private stash... wait... where's the private stash? ADMIRAL DOOOOOOOOOOE!!!!! Dag Nabbit Dammit! You've been standing up there since they blew up that annoying sniper, how could you slip and fall... wait, something's happening!

NaziFaceMelt.gif Also TwinkieWienerDog.png

I just found out that turntable has a built in music finder. Now I don't have to battle with uploads anymore, it iz gud day.

You search one of the tents and a Frenchman Pops out. He informs you that he is known as Spypolean Bonerpart. He offers you a deal, in exchange for certain considerations he'd be willing to tell you the location of the Pirate Captain's Rum Stash. Instead, you slap him around a bit. ...He liked it, but furthermore he agrees to tell you where the Rum Stash is. You follow his directions and locate the Hidden Rum/Scrumpy Stash. Then you have the Cannibals deliver it to their villiage where it can be hidden (again) until you find a way off the island. Before you leave, you offer the captain a swig of your "Orange Juice". Considering that the Captain is trying to avoid Scurvy he gratefully obliges, then promptly passes out, just as you had earlier. With the Pirate Captain passed out, now you can loot his ship for parts. Jenkins manages to make another Slightly busted Shield. You haven't decided where to put it yet. Considering that you've already explored this end of the island, you might as well try the other side. Besides, you probably want to be far away from that Pirate Captain when he wakes up. You pass back by the Cannibal village where your lackeys deposit their ill gotten Rum & Scrumpy and move on towards the other side. There aren't many places where someone could hide an evil base on this island, so if it wasn't by the Pirates it must be over here somewhere. Then you discover a cave, this must be the place... I'm sorry, I don't understand that input.

Since interest seems to be dying off, either through my own inept storytelling skills or scarcity of any real progression, I'm going to attempt to wrap up this whole island thing as I have envisioned in my head. If you want to post Action Commands inbetween, go ahead, but I'll be trying to post updates regardless.

Turntable hates me Edit: Figured out how to solve one problem I was having.

You already got Ye Flask! That Demo seems familiar somehow... No matter, you wander over to him with the intention of adding another crewman to your ever growing list. You walk up to him to say hi. But he seems none too interested... Too busy moping over some kind of crashed ship. Suddenly he notices your presence and hops up on the shattered remains of (presumably) his boat. He sends an accusing finger your way claiming this is all your fault! Then a sudden realization sets in, this is the pirate captain from earlier! Instead of attacking, he offers a grudging alliance. Not only does he want to find a way out of this hellhole, but he claims there is a mysterious force known only as the engineer watching everyone's every move. He claims maybe if the two of you work together, separately of course (he has his own crew), maybe you can find the entrance to the engineer's base on this island. Of course, you aren't going to take a simple "no" as an answer, so you try to convince him to join you with an offer of loot (knowing that it's a pirate's one weakness). The Captain says he'll think about it. Status Update -You lost the Croc Necklace -Everything else is the same

You both Equip and subsequently show off your fancy new gubbinz. You use the metal from some of the soup cans to craft a bucket. Stuff like lava is always useful, so you carefully gather some of it up to save for later. Jenkins using the scope on his new club points out a Demoman on the beach neighboring the lava flow. Status Updates -You gained a Bucket of Lava -Jenkins is now using the Rifle Party ->You ->Jenkins ->Chef Pyro ->Pith Pyro ->Other Pyro Inventory ->Captain Dan's Soup ->Coconut Gun ->Normal/Flaming Coconuts ->Suspicious Orange Juice ->Croc Tooth Necklace ->Slightly Busted Shield ->Rifle 'w' No bullets (Jenkins)

There was the fact that you could always just backtrack to the nearest medbot though. And the fact that you were always sitting on enough healthpacks that you could build a fort outta them.

Isn't that from Saint's Row?

Before you can loot the Sniper's campsite the cannibals rush in to dispose of the recently deceased sniper, among other things. At least they saved his hat and muttonchops. Then they toss you a couple of things. Might as well, That sniper probably had it coming anyway. Serves him right. Jenkins manages to scavenge some kind of shield from bits of the steering wheel and other scraps. The party Heads north. There appear to be tents and something on fire in the distance. Also Lava. Status Updates -You killed a sniper and blew up his van -Jenkins Crafted you a Shield -Jenkins grew some hair on his face -One of the Pyro Cannibals got a hat -You got a Rifle with no bullets (since they all blew up) -You got that Sniper's Croc tooth Necklace, doesn't quite fit you though. -You posed as a Team Party ->You ->Jenkins ->Chef Pyro ->Pith Pyro ->Other Pyro Inventory ->Captain Dan's Soup ->Coconut Gun ->Flaming Coconuts ->Normal Coconuts ->Suspicious Orange Juice ->Rifle 'w' no bullets ->Croc Tooth Necklace ->Slightly busted Shield

>Be Halibut >Working in Gmod >Realize you're posting uncompressed 1920x1200 screenshots I have a question for you all. Is everything loading okay or should I scale these down before posting? Also I've reformatted some of the earlier posts so they're visually easier to read. I'm also tempted to remake the first three-ish image posts.

After seeing you defeat their chief so easily (and bonking them all in the face with coconuts), the Tribals eagerly join your party. The Chief however? Nowhere to be found. Wear Jenkins? But he's not even in your size! Besides, it looks like he found a scarf all on his own. Jenkins has also retrieved that suspicious orange juice that was left behind. Before you can say anything, one of the tribals enters his hut and returns with a weapon before setting out on his journey with you. It appears to be some kind of flail made from the grisly remains of one of their past visitors. You weren't even sure if there was a sniper over there, but any excuse to fire flaming coconuts is a good one! -Three Cannibals joined your party -Chef Cannibal obtained the Torso Flail Weapon -Jenkins Found a Scarf Inventory ->Captain Dan's Soup ->Coconut Gun ->Flaming Coconuts ->Normal Coconuts ->Suspicious Orange Juice Obligatory: What do you do?

As you sneak in closer to the tribals you notice that a frontal assault may not be the best option. They're cannibals cooking what looks like Jenkins! You could never eat Jenkins! Well... maybe just a bite. But you've got to get him off the fire first! You attempt to lure the Natives into a false sense of security by offering them some of your Captain Dan's Soup. For better or worse the cannibals stop what they're doing... The Chief Decides you'd be a better morsel than some suspicious tin cans labeled soup. So you punch him in the face instead. Using the Spurt Function of your coconut gun, you defeat the Cannibals quite Handily. Since their food was Jenkins, the act of stealing it results in his rescue. -Jenkins has joined your party. -Coconut Gun can now Fire Flaming Coconuts in addition to normal Coconuts. Inventory ->Captain Dan's Soup ->Coconut Gun ->Flaming Coconuts ->Normal Coconuts In the distance you notice some kind of camping vehicle parked not far from the Tribals. >Be Halibut >Lrn2gmod What do you do?

Having already been assaulted by several of them you decide to leave them where they are until you can find a use for them. You gather what's left of your ship and say some fond farewells. Fortunately, most of the Soup Survived the journey. Using the metal from the cans of Soup and the wood from your wrecked boat you manage to make a coconut gun. This gun fires in spurts, and you get the feeling that whoever it hits is gonna hurt. Now that you have armament and an essentially infinite supply of ammo you head off the beach, away from your crash site. In the distance you notice what appear to be Tribals, or natives as the case may be, cooking something. What do you do?