Raccoons are bastards. I'll go first!
We were staying a couple days with our neighbor Rick in his RV. We were at an RV site up north, and Rick's RV was nice as fuck, expensive ass RV. So one night, we'd finished grilling and having dinner and shit, and so we all went inside and chilled out. Rick left the cooler outside the RV as per usual, but forgot to secure the lid with bungee cords and whatnot. So the raccoons opened the cooler in the goddamn middle of the night and stole his fucking Publix cheesecake. That was a GOOD ASS cheesecake too! It probably cost like 60 bucks and nobody got a single piece of it! Raccoons are too smart for what they are, man.