FreshHalibut

holy fuck thanks bad grafix lmao

Just submitted the final version of my master's thesis to the examn commission
 
 

So the European chairman of the company introduced himself to me and told me he's heard great things about me.
 
I'm still in shock.

oh shit son it's almost time for monster hunter generations

Man, fuck comcast and their data caps.
 
 
I pray now for google fiber or Verizon fios to show up here.

Jack takes these investigatory moments to quietly sit in the corner and rebuild his Ubercharge
Hahaha Oktoberfest!
 

 
 
You check out the Notice Board next to the Office Watercooler Dispenser and stock up on Ammo
There are some memos about workplace safety and a missing person poster.
The person on it looks delicious familiar somehow...
 

 
 
You inquire as to the whereabouts of Jenkins using the robots native tongue.
In response the Diminutive robit wheels itself to the middle of the room and projects an image onto the wall
WHAT COULD IT MEAN?
 

 
 
You grab the briefcase and have a seat, but the nature of the combination lock eludes you!
Both the combination 1,1,1,1 and 1,2,3,4 don't seem to work!
 

 
 
But it was free!
 

 
 
The Fireplace is quite warm, although lacking in illumination, which lends this office a subtle sinister feeling.
It's quite impressive that the desk is made of pure mahogany, and there appear two radio devices and a clipboard occupying it.
Upon further investigation, the Clipboard seems to outline some kind of operation in Egypt, the specifics are a bit too technical.
 
 
What Hat?
 

 
 
 
Smash them with a Hammer!
This just leaves the teleporter in the middle remaining.
 

 
 
 
You proceed through the center remaining teleporter ready to give whoever's on the other side a piece of your mind.
"Go back to Calgary, ya cow-herdin' Canadian!"
Hwat.avi ~ Engineer
 

 
Having Freshly Arrived in what appears to be SANDY CANADA It's Time to check out the sights!
SallyJack is right behind us, he's just second in line for the teleporter.
 
 
Several Sights peak your interest,
-There appears to be some kind of Bazaar for trading goods full of miscellaneous shops
-What appears to be an expedition crew is gearing up not far away
-There is also the welcoming committee, with tourist information pamphlets
 
Surely somebody here has a lead on what's going on.
 
New Thread Theme
 
Inventory Updooted
 
Party
 
 
Non Committal Environment Design!
 
>_____

I got a beer and when I sat down at my computer I realized I didnt have a bottleopener so instead of going back to get one I spent ten minutes looking at youtube videos on how to open a beer bottle
 
I did succeed though

You casually bonk one of SallyJack's Tickets up against the pile of Saxxys
The Ticket transforms into a Golden Ticket worth TWO items!
 

 
 
You decide to throw all four of them anyway, the Bonk Bros become *Solid Gold!* and also *INCREDIBLY HEAVY*
Fortunately, as we've already seen, You Possess unparalleled strength when presented with nonsensical endeavors, so carrying them around will be a non issue.
 

 
 
 
You present the dapper man behind the counter with your Golden Ticket and two normal tickets. This allots you a four item shopping spree!
Before you can get started however, the Clerk notices SallyJack's Fabulous mustache and grants you a boon of a drink on the house!
With the free drink and four item shopping spree, you acquire the following items.
 
>Backpack - A convenient place to carry all your things! Equip your back with a pocket today!
>Stickbomb - A versatile exploding stick!
>SHOTGUN - A different kind of Boom Stick
>SledgeHammer - Great at all sorts of things!
>Bonk Energy Drink - The Bawston Bawnkery's most popular drink!
 
 
You smash the newly acquired weapons against the saxxies, but nothing happens!
It seems the Mann Co store has applied an anti-australium coating to it's weapons to prevent being them from being illegitimately golded.
 
 
 
You investigate the mysterious Plot-Advancing private door, the door is locked.
Using all your lockpicking skills and ingenuity you use one of the newly golded Bonk Bros as a battering ram and attempt to bash the door down.
This proves ineffectual, until the gentleman behind the counter comes over and unlocks it for you.
 

 
>Look Private Office
 

 
This office is full of suspicious material, you're not sure why, but you feel like there's a lead as to Jenkin's whereabouts in here.
 
New Thread Theme
 
Inventory Updated
 
Party
 
Investigate!
>_______
 
 
Apologies about the slowness of updates, I'm going to try to update more frequently.

You casually bonk one of SallyJack's Tickets up against the pile of Saxxys
The Ticket transforms into a Golden Ticket worth TWO items!
 

 
 
You decide to throw all four of them anyway, the Bonk Bros become *Solid Gold!* and also *INCREDIBLY HEAVY*
Fortunately, as we've already seen, You Possess unparalleled strength when presented with nonsensical endeavors, so carrying them around will be a non issue.
 

 
 
 
You present the dapper man behind the counter with your Golden Ticket and two normal tickets. This allots you a four item shopping spree!
Before you can get started however, the Clerk notices SallyJack's Fabulous mustache and grants you a boon of a drink on the house!
With the free drink and four item shopping spree, you acquire the following items.
 
>Backpack - A convenient place to carry all your things! Equip your back with a pocket today!
>Stickbomb - A versatile exploding stick!
>SHOTGUN - A different kind of Boom Stick
>SledgeHammer - Great at all sorts of things!
>Bonk Energy Drink - The Bawston Bawnkery's most popular drink!
 
 
You smash the newly acquired weapons against the saxxies, but nothing happens!
It seems the Mann Co store has applied an anti-australium coating to it's weapons to prevent being them from being illegitimately golded.
 
 
 
You investigate the mysterious Plot-Advancing private door, the door is locked.
Using all your lockpicking skills and ingenuity you use one of the newly golded Bonk Bros as a battering ram and attempt to bash the door down.
This proves ineffectual, until the gentleman behind the counter comes over and unlocks it for you.
 

 
>Look Private Office
 

 
This office is full of suspicious material, you're not sure why, but you feel like there's a lead as to Jenkin's whereabouts in here.
 
New Thread Theme
 
Inventory Updated
 
Party
 
Investigate!
>_______
 
 
Apologies about the slowness of updates, I'm going to try to update more frequently.

Went to a Comic Con, met Slyvester McCoy, Sophie Aldred and Peter Davison.
 
Sylvester and Sophie all complemented me on my cosplay of the Seventh Doctor and McCoy called me out during his panel and showed me off to the panel.
 
 
 
 
 
I'm still screaming.

You ask the Bonk Bros to join your party and quest for Jenkins, explaining that this would offer them the chance to bust heads instead of having their heads busted.
And that they definitely won't be used as canon fodder.
 
The Bonk bros refuse however on the grounds that they have already formed a party and got matching outfits and everything.
Being a fifth wheel would just really be a drag.
 
 
You ask the hooligans to let you pass, citing Jenkins as a friend of yours, before they can answer you attempt to march past the barricade and enter the store.
The Bonk Bros. quickly catch onto your antics and use their special BonkBros-Homerun technique to knock you back down the steps.
 

 
It's clear a civil approach isn't going to work isn't going to work with these self proclaimed Bostonians.
 

 
 
Since the diplomatic approach didn't work, Stealth is the next option. Using a conveniently located Trashcan, you attempt to bypass the gang of Scouts.
 

 
Seems they're too keen for that.
 
 
SallyJack uses Tattle!
 
 
 
 
Acting upon Sally Jack's Advice, you decide to benchpress the nearest heavy object to intimidate the hooligans.
The nearest object happens to be a camper van.
 

 
You manage to impress them with a few reps before the weight of the van overwhelms you.
Fortunately a quick application of Sally Jack's Medigun puts you back in top shape.
 
 
 
You challenge the Bonk Bros to a "Break Dance" battle, unbeknownst to them this is not a hip hop dance competition, but instead breaking faces to the beat.
SallyJack backs you up by popping his stored ubercharge and you charge forth into battle!
 

 
Capitalizing on the ubercharge, You awkwardly beat the Yellow Bonk Bro to death with the Green Bonk Bro.
By BASHING THEIR HEADS TOGETHER, this counts as JUMPING DAMAGE and they take extra damage for UNSPECIFIED REASONS
 

 
Two Down, Two to go. There's still some ubercharge left, which you use to Rip out one of the defeated Scout's Spines
Which you then to terrorize and pummel the Blue Bonk Bro to death with.
 

 
Unfortunately, Jack's Ubercharge wears off right after this leaving one last Bonk Bro to deal with without it.
The Red Bonk Bro tries to use the special technique Homerun, but with his three cohorts disposed of the power is reduced by 75%
You are able to endure the attack with your STRONG AMERICAN FACEBONES and retaliate with one of your own.
 

 
 
With bonk Bros utterly defeated, there's just one thing left to do.
 
 

 
Inside the Mann Co. Store you will find.
-Aisles of Mann Co. Merchandise!
-The Bawston Bawnkery!
-Other Shoppers!
-A Mysterious Private Door!
 
New Thread Theme
 
Inventory
 
Party
 

You ask the Bonk Bros to join your party and quest for Jenkins, explaining that this would offer them the chance to bust heads instead of having their heads busted.
And that they definitely won't be used as canon fodder.
 
The Bonk bros refuse however on the grounds that they have already formed a party and got matching outfits and everything.
Being a fifth wheel would just really be a drag.
 
 
You ask the hooligans to let you pass, citing Jenkins as a friend of yours, before they can answer you attempt to march past the barricade and enter the store.
The Bonk Bros. quickly catch onto your antics and use their special BonkBros-Homerun technique to knock you back down the steps.
 

 
It's clear a civil approach isn't going to work isn't going to work with these self proclaimed Bostonians.
 

 
 
Since the diplomatic approach didn't work, Stealth is the next option. Using a conveniently located Trashcan, you attempt to bypass the gang of Scouts.
 

 
Seems they're too keen for that.
 
 
SallyJack uses Tattle!
 
 
 
 
Acting upon Sally Jack's Advice, you decide to benchpress the nearest heavy object to intimidate the hooligans.
The nearest object happens to be a camper van.
 

 
You manage to impress them with a few reps before the weight of the van overwhelms you.
Fortunately a quick application of Sally Jack's Medigun puts you back in top shape.
 
 
 
You challenge the Bonk Bros to a "Break Dance" battle, unbeknownst to them this is not a hip hop dance competition, but instead breaking faces to the beat.
SallyJack backs you up by popping his stored ubercharge and you charge forth into battle!
 

 
Capitalizing on the ubercharge, You awkwardly beat the Yellow Bonk Bro to death with the Green Bonk Bro.
By BASHING THEIR HEADS TOGETHER, this counts as JUMPING DAMAGE and they take extra damage for UNSPECIFIED REASONS
 

 
Two Down, Two to go. There's still some ubercharge left, which you use to Rip out one of the defeated Scout's Spines
Which you then to terrorize and pummel the Blue Bonk Bro to death with.
 

 
Unfortunately, Jack's Ubercharge wears off right after this leaving one last Bonk Bro to deal with without it.
The Red Bonk Bro tries to use the special technique Homerun, but with his three cohorts disposed of the power is reduced by 75%
You are able to endure the attack with your STRONG AMERICAN FACEBONES and retaliate with one of your own.
 

 
 
With bonk Bros utterly defeated, there's just one thing left to do.
 
 

 
Inside the Mann Co. Store you will find.
-Aisles of Mann Co. Merchandise!
-The Bawston Bawnkery!
-Other Shoppers!
-A Mysterious Private Door!
 
New Thread Theme
 
Inventory
 
Party