Dualjay sat alone on the pier of a lake. The cold February winds coming off of the lake chilled him to the bone, but he was too sad to care. A single tear slowly rolled down his cheek and fell into his open palm. His tear-soaked palm held several small stones which he had spent the last half-hour plopping into the lake one by one. The stones caused his reflection to ripple, but even with his distorted reflection, Dualjay was able to make out that Skye standing behind him.
Skye sat down next to Dualjay, carefully wiping a tear away from his cheek with his finger. "Why the tears, Dualjay?" Skye asked giving Dualjay a concerned look. "Ever since the >Rocky Mountain Man Quest 2012 no man has been able to satisfy me in bed. Rammite came back so pumped up with manliness from all the goat headbutting and air band rocking that he wore me out like a cheap pair of shoes." Dualjay answered, now even more tears rolling down his cheeks.
Skye sighed and put an arm around Dualjay. He then said with his most comforting voice. "We've all been there my friend. One day you're on the top of the world. The next, not even the biggest bad dragon dildo can satisfy you. Have you tried paying a visit to Tyrone?" Dualjay nodded lightly and then looked away from Skye before quietly saying. "Not even Tyrone could do it for me, and you know how awesome of a bro he is." Skye looked at Dualjay with a shocked expression on his face. Thankfully, Dualjay was still too busy looking deeply into his own reflection in the water to notice.
Skye didn't say anything to Dualjay, he just sat there and thought to himself. "If Tyrone couldn't satisfy him, then no mere mortal can." Huff slowly approached the two from behind, not sure if he was interrupting anything serious. "What has you two looking so gloom?" Huff asked, still a ways down the pier from them. Skye rubbed Dualjay's back and replied. "Dualjay can't find any man that can satisfy him, not even Tyrone with all his bro powers could." Dualjay grew more sad hearing this, and curled forward, barely able to keep himself from falling off of the pier.
"Tisk tisk tisk." Huff said wiggling his finger at the two before continuing. "You should have came to me first with this problem. I could have saved you a lot of tears." Dualjay turned around almost instantly with a gleam of hope in his eyes. "It's simple, you just have to step up to double dongs." Huff said walking closer to the two. "Double dongs?" Dualjay and Skye said together with confused looks on their face.
Huff gave them a sagely nod before answering. "It's simple, you just to have them use a strap-on too. It's twice the man, for half the price." Dualjay leapt to his feet and ran up to Huff, planting a man kiss on his lips. "Why don't they teach about double dongs in school? It could save so many lives." Dualjay declared walking past Huff with a skip in his step. Huff shed a tear of pride as he said. "They say I teach them... about double penitration, but it's really they who teach me... about double penetration."
Dualjay didn't get two steps past Huff before a 1964 Buick Skylark Sport Wagon pulled onto the pier. It recklessly sped towards them, and then came to a screeching halt inches from hitting Dualjay. Skye quickly rose to his feet and raced towards Dualjay screaming. "That 1964 Buick Skylark Sport Wagon can only belong to one man... Tyrone!" They all gasped in unison as the door of the 1964 Buick Skylark SportWagon opened revealing an afro.
"My Tyrone senses done been tinglin' all day. Who be talking smack about mah dick?" Tyrone shouted getting out of the car and walking towards the group. Dualjay pointed a shaking finger at Skye to try and frame him. Tyrone stared Skye down, removed the rings from his right hand, and then plunged his right fist right into his chest. "Skye!" Dualjay and Huff screamed out while watching Tyrone pull Skye's still beating heart out of his chest. "Messin' with Tyrone ain't fo the faint of heart." Tyrone said before swallowing Skye's heart whole.
Huff shaking with anger shouted at Tyrone. "Tyrone is a real bro, he would never eat another bro's heart!" Tyrone started laughing. Then Tyrone's laugh started to change into a laugh Huff and Dualjay haven't heard in a long time. With a completely different voice Tyrone said. "It's true, Tyrone is a real bro. That's why he let me hollow out his stomach and turn him into my robot slave." Tyrone then took off his shirt and pulled back the skin on his stomach to reveal that Binary, the angry midget, was controlling Tyrone.
"Binary! I was told you were killed with a bad dragon dildo on top of the rocky mountains." Dualjay screamed hiding behind Huff. "And why are you naked?" Huff questioned while forcing Dualjay out from behind him. Binary laughed before replying "The rocky mountains were only a setback, and do you have any idea how hot it gets in here? I'd sweat to death if I was wearing clothes." This gave Huff an idea to save the day.
Huff leapt at Tyrone and pulled his already sagging pants down. "Dualjay look! DOUBLE DONGS!!!" Huff screamed falling at Tyrone's feet. Dualjay looked at Tyrone and Binary and saw it was true. With Binary hanging out of Tyrone's torso, there was indeed double the dong. "I must embrace my double dong destiny" Dualjay screamed while leaping to save the day.
Then everyone remembered that Dualjay died at the end of the Rocky Mountain Man Quest 2012, so he was a ghost the whole time. The end.
He was playing heavy, so it was incredibly obvious to see he was aimbotting. Everyone immediately reported him but the admin was being slow or some shit. He was also being loud over the mic so I muted him, and then someone said "I never really understood why people aimbot, it isnt any fun"
So then I talked about how it indeed was a bit odd, since video games are basically a way to get a false sense of achievement (serotonin etc) and if you're cheating on that you're basically cheating on cheating on making yourself feel good about yourself and how you'd need an abysmally low amount of self-esteem to drop to that level. After a few minutes of that people said he was raging at me over the mic, and a little bit later he left the server
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech and
walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was
introduced to a U.S. Marine General.
As they talked, the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what
I have seen in America."
The General said, "Well, anything I can do to help?"
The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called 'Star Trek' and
in it there is... Kirk who is Canadian, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty
who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is Japanese, but
there are NO Muslims. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why
there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians,
Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on 'Star Trek'.
The General leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador, and whispered in
his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future..."
KillaWaliid reacted to Just a Gigolo in DualJay's Double Dong Destiny
KillaWaliid got a reaction from Grobag in Need a new antivirus