Idiot Cube

No, really. What in the shit.

what in the shit

That's fine and dandy, but it's unforgivable that you neglected to give the girl ice skates!

what in the shit

Ya’ll are years behind people programming things by entering 40,000 frame perfect inputs in Super Mario World and then wrongwarping into the resulting program

Die.

Face angle tests

5e books for anyone that needs them.
 
I don't have any of the APs or modules or bestiaries though. Tell me if any are missing, there should be 4 PDFs.

Don't mind him, Caveson. If you want to be in a polygamous relationship with several anime-themed Youtube personas, that's your business.

Cube's meme-fuel shonen adventure continues with season 1 of My/Boku no (delete where appropriate) Hero Academia!
 
I really like the subversion of the "Protagonist is just TOO STRONG you guuuuuys" trope. Izuku (aka Deku the Scrub) has incredible power, but right now it's more of a hindrance than anything, and his greatest challenge is learning how to not injure himself when he throws a punch! I can't wait to see where they go with this.
 
Katsuki (aka 'Splosion Man Jr.) is being this show's Vegeta, clearly. I hope they won't take the obvious route of him becoming a villain in order to defeat Deku once and for all.
 
Tsuyu (aka Crazy Frogette) is cute and cool, but I don't get all the fuss over her. Maybe she does something really amazingly cool/cute later?
 
There are also other characters. They do stuff and say things.
 
Most importantly, All Might (aka Superman BUT COOLER) is the best thing ever. Six hundred pounds of Silver Age cheese (my second favorite kind of cheese next to pepper jack), but with a weakness that's actually interesting and significant, unlike magic green space rocks.
 

(This update post, in a true Valve fashion, was DELAYED. It was originally supposed to be for Valentine’s Day! Keep that in mind, friends!)
 
Howdy there, my SPUFpowered friends! It is I, LordAIDS Monkey, here to share with you all yet another exciting TF2 update, because I love you all! That’s right! I love each and every one of you! (Except you, Scout!) Anywho, I know that Valentine’s Day has already passed, but I think it’s always a good time to share both love and TF2 Update Ideas! Today I’d like to introduce the MATCHMAKING UPDATE...! Wait, whaddya mean there’s already a Matchmaking Update? Oh well, let’s just forget about that atrocity and pretend it never happened!  Allow me to present the backstory for this weird and wacky TF2 Update, The BETTER Matchmaking Update.
 
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Here’s the tl;dr version for you people that have better uses for their time: The Scout gets rejected by Miss Pauling and meets a magical fairy who fuses the RED team and BLU team together.
 
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Yikes! Now that’s a real doozy of a backstory for a real doozy of an update! With the mercenaries all fused together, the only logical plan is to seek the wicked fairy out, and kill her in hopes that her death will reverse the spell! Unbeknownst to to the mercenaries, The Matchmaker is actually A SUCCUBUS, and is far more evil (and lovely) than they can even begin to understand! Being a succubus gal down on her luck,  her evil plan is to fuse folks together in order to harvest their souls twice as fast when it comes to intercourse! How mean! Anyway, using Scout’s lust as a dowsing rod, they are able to locate The Matchmaker’s evil home of love, and the new map of this update!
 
The new map would be called The Love Dungeon and would be the home of an all new game mode, called ‘Infiltration Mode’. The objective would be to battle your way through The Matchmaker’s lair, fighting off her many minions. The minions are all just bots, and must be defeated in order to advance to the next room. The rooms would start out very lovey-dovey, but get progressively more sinister and challenging as you advance, up until the moment where you reach the final room, where THE EVIL MATCHMAKER AWAITS, IN HER TRUE SUCCUBUS FORM! (Which is undeniably sexy, as long as you’re into succubus girls, you buncha freaks.)
 

The Matchmaker's Evil Throne Room. Yikes!!
 
Once you reach The Matchmaker’s throne room, an exciting boss battle begins! And who might this boss battle be? If you need me to answer that question, then you’re officially a dumbass! Don’t be fooled by The Matchmaker’s good looks, because she’s quite NASTY in battle, (and in bed.) Yes, she’d be the most challenging boss in all of TF2 history, because in order to beat her, you’d need to have TEAM COORDINATION! And God knows nobody in this game has that. She’d have a variety of many dangerous attacks. One particularly devastating attack would be drawing you toward her with an alluring force, where she will then suck your soul out. There is no escape, unless a teammate melee hits you out of your trance. She’d also have an attack where she FUSES you with a bomb, (much like Merasmus does with his bomb heads). The only twist here is that the bomb explosion can damage teammates! So in order to save your team, you must run into The Matchmaker, leaving her stunned for a period of time. She’d have many more attacks that would require team coordination to successfully avoid, such as sucking you off ‘till you explode.I Indeed The Matchmaker is not an enemy to be trifled with!
 
Once The Matchmaker is defeated, huge demon arms reach out from her fireplace, dragging her back to the depths of Hell from whence she came. Don’t worry, though! I’m sure she’ll be back some other day, because I sure do love to reuse my update villains for sequels that nobody asked for! (*cough* Smissmas Dinosaur *cough*). After her defeat, her magical fusion spell reverts, and all the players in the server are randomly assigned to either RED or BLU. This is where the bloodbath occurs, where there is a final death-match between the two teams, where the winning team gets all sorts of wacky achievements! Including the all new F2P achievement hat that you’ll learn to hate! The hat, this time, being The Matchmaker’s Magical Tiara. (She dropped it as she was being dragged back to Hell.)
 

Everyone will hate you for wearing this.
 
No self-respecting TF2 update would be complete without exciting new weaponry! And this is no exception! So buckle up as I share with you a whopping THREE RESKINS and ONE “NEW” WEAPON!
 
And with a name like The Better Matchmaking Update, you’d expect some changes to the matchmaking system, right? YOU ARE CORRECT! With this update, you could expect to see the entirety of the matchmaking system completely removed! Hooray!
 

"The only thing that sucks harder than you...?  Is me!" -The Matchmaker
 
Anyway, that’s all for today’s thrilling update. Stay tuned for more exciting TF2 update ideas, amongst other things. But until then, this is LordAIDS Monkey, SIGNING OUT!

I will take all four of their chocolates and then eat them at home alone.

I will take all four of their chocolates and then eat them at home alone.

Good que$tion.

One amusing thing of the past few years has been the number of people insisting that the prequels are actually very good, and they aren't just saying that just because they first saw them when they were too young to know any better!

Abraham Lincoln.

I wish there was a way I could just... unexperience certain games. Specifically, the Ace Attorney series. Not because I dislike the experience - it's the opposite. I wish I could go through the games again, without knowing the twists and plots, but alas.
 
On that note, just got through Professor Layton vs Phoenix Wright and wew. Called about half of the finale, but didn't call the most major revelation, so it was An Interesting Time. But now I can never play it again because I know what to do.

Quite frankly, I don't mind that they're not going for speed and fluidity of movement. But they fundamentally designed a game that doesn't know what it's trying to be. It's part an exploration game where you're walking around in alien worlds and you're meant to be scared or whatever. But at the same time, you just have a gun that can kill everything pretty much instantly. There is no single point where you're actually in danger, at least from the gameplay demo. This demo is either the worst representation of its core gameplay loop or the game is just fundamentally designed poorly.
 
It's not as if you can't have a game with both an emphasis on shooting and atmosphere. System Shock, Metro, and STALKER come to mind. The gameplay can be tense during gunfights because of ammo conservation and the raw lethality of shots. These games all have quiet points where you're walking around, enjoying the atmosphere.
 
SCORN seems like it will be heavy on ammo conservation given the ammo counts on the bonegun, but what's even the point when you're never presented with any more than 3 enemies at a time. The setting is cool, but that's really all the game has going for it. It's a really cool tech demo, but that's it.

Inspired by the rare event of below-freezing temperatures today, here is a new character: Siberian Patrol
 

 

 
^^^REALLY proud of this. Feel like I raised the bar for myself here! It's the first detailed drawing of a character I've done beyond doodles and concepts in a while, and FUCK it just looks SWEET! The posing and dimension is spot-on, I feel like! And look at the detail lines to show the curve of the puffy jacket parts! That shit makes it! Man I'm fuckin PSYCHED!

https://imgur.com/gallery/gxkR2
https://imgur.com/gallery/tBrYo
 
I wanted some TF2 wallpapers, and I don't want SFM wallpapers, so ...

FBIce cream truck

With last year's biggest revelations being the entirety of Vault 7 and the Equifax breach, we're starting off this year with a two exploits (though divided into three vulnerabilities) ranging about 20 years of CPUs.
 
Article Dump:
Official Meltdown and Spectre Exploit Website Includes Q&A, CVEs, and academic papers Google Project Zero write up on Meltdown and Spectre Written by one of the researchers that found both exploits The Register - Kernel-memory-leaking Intel processor design flaw forces Linux, Windows redesign Ars Technica - What’s behind the Intel design flaw forcing numerous patches? Meltdown explanation in layman's terms Wired - A Critical Intel Flaw Breaks Basic Security for Most Computers Why Raspberry Pi isn't vulnerable to Spectre or Meltdown Includes layman's explanation of speculative execution Meltdown in Action: Dumping memory Meltdown demo - Spying on passwords Official responses from various companies Intel AMD ARM Microsoft Amazon Web Services Google Android Security Bulletin Linus Torvalds doesn't like Intel A valid complaint given that Intel thinks its ok that malicious actors can only read memory LLVM's work in progress Spectre patch for variant 2 Important information about Microsoft Meltdown CPU security fixes, antivirus vendors and you  
Basic ways to exploit these vulnerabilities:
With Spectre, an attacker can put malicious JS on a website, allowing them to read all browser memory including form data such as passwords, cookies, session tokens, and encryption keys. Similar approach can be used with Java in a sandbox. With Meltdown, an attacker can host software in some cloud environment to read memory form the host machine. Any data hosted on that server can then be read.  
tl;dr:
Two major CPU vulns just went public Exploitable CPUs allow attackers to read memory of processes currently Meltdown is exploitable on Intel CPUs while Spectre is exploitable on Intel, AMD, and ARM CPUs Meltdown is not yet verified to work on AMD or ARM CPUs Spectre is likely to affect all modern multithreading CPUs It is unclear if this exploit has ever been used publicly before now Patches have been put out for the Linux kernel, Windows, OSX, and Android but only for Meltdown so far LLVM have a work in progress patch for one of Spectre's two variants Expect lots of recompiling soon Patches are software to fix a hardware issue. This isn't going to be properly solved until a couple years down the line with a redesigned CPU generation. Performance hits are expected, and further performance hits are expected when the Spectre patches roll out Ballpark 5 to 30% performance decrease for Intel CPUs This primarily affects system calls, not computation, meaning that things like rendering or gaming shouldn't be affected in any substantial way. Expect the largest performance hits on VM software that use Hyper-V or docker containers Likely not an NSA or CIA backdoor because it would still affect their own hardware as much as anyone else As per usual, encrypt your data and use stuff like NoScript. As long as you keep up to date with software patches, the average user shouldn't be alarmed. BUT FUCKING UPDATE YOUR SHIT

Happy new year all of you
 
No matter what you're doing witb your life, whether you're bettering the world squeezing moisture off leaves to feed starving African children or waking up to play videogames all day, just make sure you're happy to wake up every morning
 
Even if this forum is dead I wish you all the best and I mean it

Hello there, once again SubSPUF pals! It’s the Holiday Season, and we all know what that means! It’s time for an all new, exciting Smissmas Update idea! “But LordAIDS Monkey”, you may ask, “didn’t we already get a new update in the form of all new taunts and a Smissmas Stocking?!” Yes! We did, and let me say that Valve’s new excuse for a Smissmas routine has really grown quite tired! But never fear, I’m HERE to introduce to all you an EXCITING new idea, cooked up a year in advance so that Valve might borrow (steal) and implement it for NEXT YEAR’S UPDATE! So sit back, relax, and enjoy the thrilling idea!
 
…
 
     It was a normal day in TF2 Land. But it wasn’t just ANY normal day! It was a normal Smissmas Day, and the Scout was throwing his yearly Smissmas Bash! All the mercs, of course, attended Scout’s little party. As Scout was going around, making sure all the guests were enjoying the festivities, he heard a peculiar noise that no party host ever wants to hear. “Ayyy, this party SUCKS!” shouted the drunken Demoman.
     “Huhuhuh! Heya, pally! There's no need to be feeling blue about my party! We’re bringing out the piñata soon, so good times are sure arise!” assured Scout. As Scout spoke, a knocking was heard at his door.
     “Yeehaw! Looks like we company, Scout! Don’t ya’ll worry, I’ll open the door faster than a barrel down a hill.” Engineer opened the door, and his jaw dropped immediately upon seeing who their guest was. Their guest was none other than the Smissmas Dinosaur himself!
     “Hello there, my little mercenaries. I’m here to warn you to be wary!
The Smissmas Holiday is currently in danger, and it’s all thanks to some mysterious stranger!
I don’t know who or what it is. But one thing’s for sure, it hates Smissmas!
So I humbly ask you for your aid, and as a reward, you shall be greatly paid.
No, not with money or things of that gist. But with a place on my jolly, nice list!”
     The mercenaries were unsure if they wanted to help the Smissmas Dinosaur. Afterall, he has tried to kill them on multiple occasions. (For those of you who are not aware, the Smissmas Dinosaur has been a recurring villain of sorts, as the mercenaries are always on the naughty list!) The mercenaries were also a bit confused as to what the task at hand was. Smissmas in danger? What?! Scout spoke up. “Huhuhu! Hey, Mr. Dinosaur, I for one, would love to help ya’ out! But, uh, what is it exactly you want us to do? Huhuhu.”
     “If we want to see our halls be decked, then I have some gifts you must protect!
For many of the presents I’ve made this year, have vanished, yes, disappeared!
A menace must be behind this trick... It must be a holiday-hating-prick!
So I ask of you, dear little Scout! Please figure what this mess is about!
If you don’t, Smissmas will take a bad toll! And you’ll all be receiving some dino-shit coal.”
     “Well, count us in then!” The mercs all shouted with glee! Yes, for once the mercs have all unanimously agreed on something. And thus it was decided, that they would seek out this holiday-hater. But, who in the right mind WOULD be such a holiday hater? Let’s find out!
Meanwhile, in a dark, snowy cavern, was a tall figure sitting by a warm fire lit by burning Smissmas presents and the dreams of children. “Gah. I hate presents. I hate snow, I hate that dinosaur. But most of all, I HATE SMISSMAS!” This monster was none other than… THE BAH-HUM BUG! And this guy is bad news for sure! He decided to, once more,  steal the presents and dreams of children. And so he donned his hat, and set out.
     Later, the mercenaries were guarding their presents, and that’s when the Bah-Hum Bug appeared! “Hello mercenaries. Just step aside, and I’ll be taking your gifts.”
“Huhuhu! No chance, pally! These gifts are the property of the children, so you aren’t getting them!” Scout and his friends all formed a great barrier to block the Bah-Hum Bug’s attempts, but the Bah-Hum Bug came prepared to deal with these silly mercs.
     “Hmmph! Fine then! Get a taste of THIS!” Suddenly, the Bah-Hum Bug began absorbing the holiday spirit from all the mercenaries! “Hahaha! This will make great fuel for my fire back home! Now step aside, those gifts are MINE!” The mercenaries, now essentially soulless, listened to the Bah-Hum Bug. The Bah-Hum Bug made off with the gifts, and this is where our update begins!
 
...
 
     This update would be shipped with an all new game-mode, that ties directly to my Smissmas Story! The gamemode, Smissmas Spirit, will feature take place in a fairly large map, split off into two separate zones. In the first zone is where the bulk of the match will occur. The decor here would be some sort of snowy hill, with a couple of structures to provide shelter. Here, RED and BLU will be pitted in a usually death match, where the objective is to kill one another, and collect the small bits of holiday spirit from their victims. There will also be small spawns of holiday spirit across the map that must be collected. After a set time, the first portion of the map will come to an end. Whichever team collects the most holiday spirit wins this portion.
     Now this where things get REAL crazy. After the first portion of the game, the mercs are magically teleported into the Bah-Hum Bug’s icy lair. Whichever team won the first portion of the game receives significant buffs in this second portion of the match. But in this second portion, the objective is not to kill one another, but to kill the Bah-Hum Bug himself! That’s right! The Bah-Hum Bug makes an appearance as the boss this update! He’d, of course, have many dangerous attacks at his disposal, including throwing bombs, throwing presents, throwing present bombs, and a short-ranged attack that absorbs your holiday spirit, draining all your ammo and dropping you to 1 hp. (But an FYI, Scouts using the Wrap Assassin or Candy Cane, Heavies using Holiday Punch, and Spies using the Spycicle will be immune to this effect! However, festive weapons will not be immune, so don’t ask, you P2W sluts!) Respawn will be disabled during the second phase, so don’t die! If both teams die, everybody loses. If you happen to be alive when the Bah-Hum Bug dies, you win completely independent of your team! If you don’t win, you don’t get any goodies. Too bad!
And what are these goodies I speak of? Well, a mandatory achievement that earns you the Bah-Hum Bug’s hat! But there are even more great achievements that can be earned, including the obligatory achievement where you must win on this map 8,000 times.
 

"BAH HUMBUG!" -Bah-Hum Bug
 
     And what update would be complete without WEAPONS!? Well, according to Valve, every update is acceptable as long as they’re making money. But in my book, we oughta have weapons. So I’m gonna list a few neat concepts for you all! The mercenaries were all on the nice list this year, so they have the Smissmas Dinosaur’s permission to be total douches next year, with these cool new weapons that’ll make your team sure to hate you!
 
The Speed Snatcher
Level 0 Bat
Hit teammates to steal 10% of their speed for 3 seconds
-30% damage
No random crits
Scout can hiit teammates to take 10% of their speed to add to your own for 10 seconds. If you hit a medic healing you, you can infinitely stack speed boosts because Valve bugs are fun!
 
The Tragic Tap
Level 0 Battle Banner
Buff built through death of allies in a nearby radius
Buff refills health
Buff grants full crits
Buff only applies to user
 
This is a Soldier Banner! It fills up by ⅓ everytime a teammate dies near you. Once full, you can blow it like a regular banner, restoring your health and granting crits to you for 10 seconds.

 
The Pain-Bow
Level 0 Flamethrower
Damage increases by 15% for each teammate on fire
Can not extinguish teammates
No random crits
 
This is a Pyro Flamethrower that promotes W+M1, the likes of which no one has ever seen. For each teammate on fire, anywhere, you gain a damage increase. But you can’t extinguish pals!
 
Sharing is Caring
Level 0 Lunchbox
Feed a sandvich to a teammate to become bound to them
If your bound teammate dies, you recieve mini crits for 2 seconds
Sandwiches don’t heal
 
An all new sandvich for heavy! If this weapon doesn’t teach Heavies to share their damn Sandviches, nothing will. Eating it yourself doesn’t do anything. Don’t eat it.
 
The Frontier Vengeance
Level 0 Shotgun
Gain two revenge crits for every teammate that dies
You do not receive revenge crits if you have an active sentry
-50% clip size
No random crits
 
This is an Engie shotgun! It gains two revenge crits every time a teammate dies, keeping them stored on your HUD. You receive your crits whenever your active sentry goes down.
 
Health Insurance
Level 0 Medigun
Uber grants invincibility, knockback immunity, megaheal, 100% crit chance, and speed boost
+500% Uber build rate.
Uber remains in effect after weapon switch
-40% Uber duration
Uber only triggers on patient death
Uber does not affect patients
 
This is a Medigun! It functions like stock, but Uber builds REALLY fast! The catch is that it only activates when your patient dies, and is only capable of affecting the medic wielding it.
 
Strength in Numbers
Level 0 Sniper Rifle
Gain 20% bodyshot damage for each sniper on your team
Headshots only deal mini-crits
Can only fire when scoped
 
This is an all new rifle! This weapon rewards you to play as Outback Steakhouse Man, as they say, strength in numbers! You get a damage boost for the more snipers you have!
 
The Double-Double Agent
Level 0 Disguise Kit
Spy can initiate pain-links by backstabbing teammates
When disguised, you take 50% less damage and will not receive status effects
Cannot disguise manually
Pain-link partner receives other 25% of regular damage
 
This is an all new disguise kit! It allows you to form a bond like no other with your team. When disguised as them, they take some damage for you. You can't disguise as enemies at all!
 
Demoman doesn’t get anything because he can just play Demoknight if he wants his team to hate him.
 
And that's a wrap! Merry Smissmas to all you good folks! As always, I look forward to sharing more fantastic update ideas with you in the future. But until that day comes, this is LordAIDS Monkey, signing OUT!

Dunno if you can be proficient in everything, but the Quick Learner trait will help decrease the proficiency penalty for any new weapon you pick up. You'll still have a -2 penalty, but that's much better than the normal -4. And if you successfully disarm someone's weapon while you are unarmed, you can immediately grab the weapon. Maybe a Maneuver Master monk with all the disarm feats?
 
Get as much strength as you can, and try to adventure with casters who can Enlarge your Person.